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What To Do When Your Heart Says Yes, But Your Wedding Budget Says No
Hopefully, you won’t need this section on budget trouble, but it does happen. Combine emotions with money and new families and it can certainly be the right mix for disaster. So, how do you deal with it and still see everyone smiling and happy at the wedding? Making the rules Silly as it sounds, it may help to have a few ground rules for all the adults that are chipping in for the wedding. Perhaps you could all go out to eat and discuss what you want to do. Figure out who will pay for what and write it down. In the case of step and extended families, it may not be this easy. Unsettled discussions might creep in and accusations of one side doing more than the other can come to light. For this case, you want to talk to each side by themselves. This way neither side will be able to compare their amounts (and you won’t tell either side), and you can talk to them about their wishes in private. It’s sad that you have to be the peacekeeper in this situation, but it will help for a smoother day. A separate peace Another way to deal with the budget and any possible arguments is to set up a separate checking account into which all of the contributors can make deposits. This way, only you know the balance because you’ll get the checks to make the actual deposits and everyone gets to chip in as they can. You may also want to take the halves of the family out for different shopping errands. This way they can help with choosing items that you need, while also picking up the tab along the way. A lot of parents enjoy being active parts of the wedding plans, rather than just the money source. In most cases, you won’t have to deal with too much fuss over the wedding budget, but if you should, the best advice is to talk about it immediately. The longer you wait on something, the more stressful it will become to you and you don’t need that when you’re trying to plan a happy day. Sit everyone down and try to talk out whatever is bothering them. And if something is bothering you, it’s best to just be honest. Let them know if they don’t seem to be pulling their weight or if they’re constantly talking about your other parent negatively. There’s nothing to be gained from pretending that everything is alright.
This article was posted on December 25, 2005
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