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Ettiquette  by: Carol Dorman Etiquette Etiquette – such a pretty word. The very sound of it is classy – the kind of word you’d take home to meet Mother for a spot of tea and scones! Even its look, when written down is so “haute chic”. It must be good. There are many forms of etiquette. Here are just a few I prepared earlier. Wedding Etiquette: Don’t tell the bride your invitation never came – just assume she already knows and turn up anyway. Restaurant Etiquette: USE THE SILVERWARE – DON’T STASH IT and strive to give the impression that French/Italian/Chinese/ whatever the cuisine speciality is/ is actually your first language (so never, I repeat, NEVER act surprised when your ordered dish arrives) Table Etiquette: As above, except for the language bit. It should be noted, however, that “At-home-table Etiquette” allows for relaxing the silverware principle whenever the cricket’s on telly. Dating Etiquette: “Yes” means "Yes", “No” means "No" and “Maybe” means "Possibly, but really, well…. No.” (“I’ll call you” and “Let me think about it” both mean “HELL, NO!”) Teenage Etiquette: Whatever Thorpie does because…Like, you know, it’s coz it’s really sick and stuff but don’t say anything coz that’d be really gay. Got me? Ah, etiquette. Unpretentious, yet so powerful. One can sense when Etiquette enters the room. Heads turn, faces smile and all seems right with the world. Extend that hand, embrace that small talk, master the subtle topic change and breathe again. © Carol Dorman About The Author Based in Sydney, Australia, Carol Dorman is a Commercial Writer and owner of Quill Writing Services. Quill provides compelling content for websites, newsletters and can fulfil all your writing needs. When words count, count on Quill! http://quillwritingservices.com.au. quillwriting@iprimus.com.au This article was posted on January 19, 2006   View More Videos from the "Humor" category: Dinner for Schmucks Movie Review How to Handle the Light in Stand Up Comedy South Park Parody on Jersey Shore How to Create a Tool Kit for Stand Up Comedy   Read More Articles from the "Humor" Category: U. S. Seniors Retiring To Iraq; Say That’s Where The Medicare Money Is. by Tom Attea Congress, It';s Like The Smell Coming From The Garbage Can by Steve Yeich How to Get Revenge on Your Ex in 1 Easy Step by Luke Carter Crime At Academy Awards: Gangster Movie Outguns Little Miss Sunshine by Tom Attea Smiles Will Constantly Brighten Your Day by Whinston Sparks SMS Jokes and Crazy Sayings to Cheer Up Your Mood by Whinston Sparks Land of the Rising Gas by Kevin Burns Coyote Excuses Predatory Behavior; Claims Was Molested By Cocker Spaniel by Tom Attea Social Security And The Mystery Of The Missing Boomer FICA Payments by Tom Attea Russell Peters – A Comedy style that creates the newest Cultural Laugh-In. Laughter the Best Medicine Especially Laughing at Yourself by Carl Chesal << Back to "Humor" Index

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