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Thank You For Your Patience  by: Carol Dorman Thank You For Your Patience (We’ll Be With You As Soon As Possible) How many times have you heard that when you make a phone call? A phone call about something absolutely vital to your current state of mind? A matter of utmost importance to the nation’s welfare - nay - the WORLD’S!! (All right, that may be a bit exaggerated - but hey, I’m annoyed!) It seems that every corporation, government department, odds and sods subsidiary - in fact any entity that has its own logo - these days is incapable of providing real live people to talk to on a “first contact” basis. Of course there is the option of eventually talking to a real, live person. At least that’s what we’re told - by the machines. But can you really trust a machine that cannot feel your pain? Ah, I digress – yes a real human may become available as long as you have a good 20 minutes or so to spare. (a conservative figure) Now there’s a lot one can do in 20 minutes while waiting for the real live person to materialise at the other end of the phone line. Wash some dishes, clean something, think about cleaning something. A fully qualified Domestic Engineer could even have a batch of scrumptious bikkies in the oven! But then we’re faced with another dilemma. What if they turn up and I’m not there? They’ll hang up and, what’s worse, they’ll think I’m not the really nice person I am because I wasn’t there to show them what a really nice person I am and… #**#$#%%# BURNT BISCUITS!! So you stay there, on the end of the phone, humming to the dulcet strains of “I Left My Soul in Some Elevator” played in D minor (hey, isn’t everything?) on something pretending to be a baby grand but is actually computer-generated by the same digital dolly apologising for your inconvenience and assuring you that your call is important to her... And wait for your call to progress in the queue. © Carol Dorman About The Author Carol Dorman is a Commercial Writer and owner of Quill Writing Services. Quill provides compelling content for websites, newsletters and can fulfil all your writing needs. When words count, count on Quill! http://quillwritingservices.com.au. quillwriting@iprimus.com.au This article was posted on January 19, 2006 Read More Articles from the "Humor" Category: Bigamist Begs For Life Imprisonment;Seeks Escape From 40 Wives by Tom Attea Double Peppermint Schnapps on the Rocks by Kingston Amadan Cheryl Crow Touches Carl Rove; Arm Falls Off by Tom Attea Mountain Lion Attacks Son. Dad Attacks Mountain Lion. by Tom Attea Hezbollah Stars In Middle East’s First Polish Joke by Tom Attea What is Islamic Behavior? Generally, How Islamic People Behave by Tom Attea Why Are The Most Successful Electric Cars On Mars? by Tom Attea The Perks of Global Warming by Nola L. Kelsey Queen Finds An Intruder! by Robert Locke Crime At Academy Awards: Gangster Movie Outguns Little Miss Sunshine by Tom Attea << Back to "Humor" Index

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